I normally post a NYE photo on the gram, but decided my shout out to this year would be too long for the description, and, well, TL;DR.
Let’s go, short and sweet.
Notably 2015 was the worst year of my life. Still, I had no expectations of the next year being better because even with a seemingly empty soul, I already had so much and my heart was full. A part of me was content, thinking I could peak there and be satisfied for the rest of my years. Did I want more? Sure. But when you wake up and witness how fragile life can be – and it’s not even your own that scares you, it’s the ones you love, the ones you have always assumed to be there to scold you about coming home for dinner every night before they walk you down the aisle, the one who will crawl into bed next to you in the mornings to wake you up and give you back rubs until you fall back asleep, the one you thought would mind your child for you while you go to work and teach them all the good things they taught you – it’s then that more feels synonymous to a guilty indulgence. No, Jen, you don’t deserve that.
So, did I want more? No. Did I get more? Oh my god, yes.
2016 was happiness. 2016 was about me. 2016 was about confidence, about stepping outside of comfort zones, about travel, sunshine and perspective. 2016 was about smiling.
2017. May we continue to find happiness in the little things and joy in the company we choose to keep.
And may I, find something that I love to do (and be paid for it, need to put this disclaimer in as I can hear my coach’s voice going ‘you need to quit your day job and be a professional fighter’). I’ve somehow committed to writing a blog a week – more stories, less diary. By writing this out and confessing, it means I’ll try. I stopped reading for a better half of 6 months now. Shock. Horror. I started reading a novel on my laptop whilst sitting in a cafe the other day and realised how much I’d missed it. The quality of my writing has seen an impact to this too. Many things to do. Dreams aren’t for kids.